It has been a full and busy fall.
I have engaged in a lot of both beautiful and challenging work and learning this year. Thanks to all of you who have been part of that. And to the rest of you out there being part of good work in the world. I am just about to tuck in for a couple of weeks of rest and time with my family and with myself. My to do list is not totally done. And I am pausing anyway. I wish you some pause too.
This past month in Leadership Mind (year long inquiry program), we have been inquiring into core underlying beliefs about doing things right, getting things right and being enough. We are all in various ways living 'good' and 'successful' lives and it has been humbling for us to illuminate all the places that we are also limited and suffering with underlying beliefs that we have to do things right - as parents, partners, leaders, employees, citizens... and then again finding so many places where beliefs that we are not good enough, or experienced enough, or smart enough, or successful enough, or impactful enough or... are operating under the surface. Sometimes loudly causing noticeable, painful reactions, self-sabotage, avoidance, blocking, playing small... Sometimes unnoticed yet quietly impacting our choices, undermining our courage, our voice, our ability to step fully into our lives and relationships.
We have been inquiring into these beliefs together using The Work, exploring the patterns and finding the cracks and letting some light in. We have been experiencing who we are when we are not run by this impossible thinking. Impossible because it doesn't align with reality. We have noticed that it is impossible to always do it right. And that when we really lean into reality, it gets unclear what 'right' is anyway. How would we know for sure? The same happens with 'enough.' Who sets the standard? How do we really know when we are 'enough'?. We have noticed that with the belief in place, the bar can continue to move, and 'enough' never happens.
We can't afford to wait until we are enough, or until we can ensure we will get everything right. And it turns out we don't need to. Imagine, if everyone waited, how life would grind to a halt. And yet we can continue to unconsciously live in the prison of this thinking.
Who would you be without the thought "I am not enough?" - in whatever moment you find yourself?
Notice where you are enough.
Notice where it is irrelevant whether you are 'enough' or not, where life is not waiting for you to be enough, where it just flows anyway.
The fear that came up for many of us in our inquiries into the 'doing it right' and 'enough' beliefs was that if we let go of this thinking we would stop learning, wouldn't be motivated to grow or be good people. What we noticed was that when we were really in the clutches of this thinking, we were at least able to grow and be our best selves. Without these beliefs we were more present, clear thinking, creative, courageous and moved to action. Interesting.
Check it out for yourself. Do your own inquiry and see what you find.
Wishing you peace in your imperfection this holiday time.
And the joy of all of our imperfect offerings.
Ring the bells that still can ring.
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack, a crack, in everything.
That's where the light gets in.